Unexpected Birthday Gifts

Unexpected birthday gifs
Last Thursday was my birthday.I woke up in sweat, in my dream I was waiting on line to see the doctor , everybody was carrying dirty , soiled, old patched , badly damaged or broken angel or bird wings, the doctor wold lift some feathers and would find the cancer. The whole thing looked very little promising.The day before I literally worked 21 hours straight  trying to finish up all details for the launch of my indiegogo  campaign .
I had chosen not to have a party for my 50th birthday and I had  convinced myself that dates didn’t matter, I will celebrate it later, maybe in Christmas when this campaign madness would be over.
Went to rest at 4:30 am for 1hour, got up at 5:30 to record an  self-hypnosis audio for a cancer patient. I had to do that before the city would wake up with its noisy life .
I jumped out of bed in a shock and went  to grab a pen to process the experience.
Still in the dark atmosphere of the dream, I forced  myself to do the recording for my patient as the agitation of the city went into an unstoppable crescendo. My computer crashed doing that and  I decided it was enough signs. I thought that maybe wasn’t enough to explore the symbolic meaning  but need to make sure that the dream wasn’t insisting on a literal check up that I was postponing.  I went to see the doctor to probe  a suspicious spot that was bothering me for few months already. All was good.
Next was to take care of the broken wings of the computer. Called my technician. Fixed it. He mentioned he was going to have lunch and i told him that was my birthday and if he wanted to eat together. He took me to the most hideous place where I could not eat a single bit . When the bill came, he didn’t motion to pay , leaving it clear he assumed I had invited him. I was almost in tears , I called a friend to share how sad I was I was doing that to myself on my 50th birthday and after listening for few minutes she went into a full blown account of how unbalanced  my life was and how I needed a break, she obviously wasn’t familiar with the rigor of  launches, unforgiving with sentimental staff like birthdays. She later sent a mail breaking formally our friendship as I was killing myself and she didn’t want to witness that. I thought it was quite dramatic and didn’t even finish reading it.
To finish up the day I decided I would do something for myself and called a massage therapist I had few massages from over the  summer. I liked his hands very much and I needed the infallible wellbeing of a good bodywork session. It was awesome as usual.
On leaving I mentioned it was my birthday and he invited me for dinner. I asked in disbelieve , you mean , you are taking me out for dinner ?- yes, I reiterated my question and share my misunderstanding with my computer person. No mistake I heard well.
He took me to the most luxurious restaurant I had been in many years, we had champaign,  wines, amazing food, and an improvised cake with candles. The service was great and I felt treated like a princess. The masseur turned out to be an ex- lawyer that tired of the confrontational life of a highly successful attorney went into bodywork to satisfy and old soul longing. Not only he paid for dinner but gave me an unforgettable  experience and pearls of wisdom on following the heart urges.
Went to sleep melting in gratitude, thinking how outrighteously funny, whimsicaly  life  behaves.  I had to pay for a hideous  launch to somebody I didn’t invited and ended up being treated as a queen by somebody I hardly knew.
You extract your own lesson from that , as to me , I take it as wink , a reminder, that beyond my own efforts, life is taking care of me always, even if I am blind to it.


Published by Edivia Navarro

Psycho-oncologist. Cancer Guide. Director & CEO of IDEITA. Institut for the Developpment, Education and Investigation in the Alexander Tecnique .Director of TRANSFORM-ACCION

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